Two Dogs, One Walk

(Two walks, actually – I took one, then the other, but it was the same route.)

Put Pepper on leash and head out for a quiet, relaxing walk.
Boys playing basketball = OMG. What is that. OMG. That is terrifying. OMG. That is the most horrifying thing I have ever seen in my life. OMG. IT KEEPS MAKING NOISE. WTF.
Dog barks from inside house = IT’S GOING TO GET ME.
Man using power saw in his garage = HE IS GOING TO SLICE US UP WITH THAT THING.
Car parked on street = OMG WHAT IS THAT. THIS IS THE MOST HORRIFYING THING I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE.
Black man wearing white hoodie = HE IS GOING TO END US BOTH.
Cars on street a quarter of a mile away = THOSE ARE CLEARLY GOING TO COME KILL US.

Back home, get Auggie. Take Auggie out for a walk.
Boys playing basketball = BASKETBALL YAY!!
Man getting bags out of back of car = WHAT’D YOU BUY IS THAT FOR ME?
Dobermans in house barking = HI FRIENDS LET’S PLAY!!
Man using power saw in his garage = WHAT ARE YOU MAKING IS THAT FOR ME?
Car parked on street = I’M GONNA GO THIS WAY AROUND IT, YOU GO THAT WAY, IT’LL BE FUN!!
Asian woman power-walking = YOU HAVE FABULOUS SHOES!!
Cars on street a quarter of a mile away = CAN WE GET ONE OF THOSE I LIKE THE RED ONE!!
Dad vacuuming out truck when we get home = HURRAY LET’S GO FOR A RIDE!!

Choose your moral:
To Pepper, everything is TERRIBLE. To Auggie, everything is AWESOME.
or
Pepper lives in a horror movie. Auggie lives in Teletubby Land.