Auggie + Kong = ANNOYING.

It’s not like I call him The Annoying Thing for no reason.

Every night this week Auggie has gone into his crate and lay down to lick and chew his Kong. He spends maybe an hour with it and then he falls asleep.
Now, this is nice. He gets out of my hair and leaves me alone.

What’s NOT nice is the slurping, the squeaking, the terribly disgusting, annoying sounds.
AUGH. SQUEAK-SLURP… slurp slurp slurp… SQUEAKEDY SQUEAKY… slosh slosh slurp slosh… SQUEAK… slurp slurp… SQUEAK-A SQUEAK-A SQUEAK SQUEAK… slurp squeak slurp squeak…

I even put a squeaky tennis ball into his crate hoping he’d start obsessively squeaking it instead, because that would at least be a positive change. NOPE. Still licking and slobbering all over the Kong.
I don’t want to take it away from him because this is the entire point of the Kong, he’s supposed to lick it and keep himself occupied… but UGH.
I’m pretty sure he knows it disgusts me and that’s why he’s doing it. “Don’t want to play with me? Okay. I’m going to go be noisy and gross! Enjoy!” Sometimes he follows me around making these nasty slopping and slurping noises just to annoy me, without even having eaten anything, so that’s why I’m pretty sure he is doing this on purpose too.

The other day I told him I’m going to get a terrorist puppy and make it bother him all day long and THEN he’ll be sorry.